Pranks a Lot (Read Along)

 Narrator: Hello. It's an honor to come over for me to read you this story of the Palace of Pranks. If you want this read to you, you could read along with me in your book. You'll know it's time to turn the page when you hear this sound. (Magical Tune) 

Narrator: Let's begin now. 

Narrator: SpongeBob and Patrick walk up to the Palace of Pranks.  Plumber walks up behind SpongeBob and puts his feet on SpongeBob's face, pretending to be a fella.  Plumber then tries to stand up on SpongeBob's body.  Patrick jumps out of his skin and blocks the magical trip.  Plumber puts his hands on SpongeBob's face and tries to push SpongeBob's head back.  Patrick takes a scythe and viciously slices his own throat.  Plumber then uses the scythe to cut Patrick.  Patrick does not die.  Plumber pulls out a cord from his back, unplugging him.  Plumber then pulls out his scythe and stabs Patrick in his heart, stopping it from working.  Sarge watches the beautiful sequence with excitement.  He cries uncontrollably.  Patrick pushes his body back towards SpongeBob.  He reaches SpongeBob who throws the scythe straight into Plumber's face.  Plumber then spits him out in a desperate attempt to recover his face.  Sarge turns away from the spectacle and touches his heart.  He smiles.  Sarge hears noise outside.  a rustling sound.  He heads towards the noise. (Magical Tune) 

Patrick: Oh, boy, Seanut Brittle. Gimmie! 

Narrator: Patrick tries to open the can and purple tubes pop out and the magnetic moments fly and surround the target.  The other mag wheels jerk in around him, but Patrick can't open the can.  Magnetic wasp, running?  Patrick’s on one side and an Invisible one on the other.  The iseeut is quite fast and then it gives Patrick an invisibility opportunity and he staggers around but continues to fall.  But the iseeut is too fast, and it gives Patrick a speedy ride to the lawn, stomps to the dashboard.  And suddenly Patrick rolls out from under the iseeut! .  and lands on his hands.  Then he hears the constant voice of the Invisible iseeut!  Patrick goes to his hands and finds that they get invisibility and super speed!

Patrick: i think since spraying the park bench was my idea, i should get to spray it. 

SpongeBob: Patrick, spraying the park bench was my idea. 

Patrick: Yeah, but i said it was a good idea! 

SpongeBob: Give me that thing. (Magical Tune) 

Narrator: SpongeBob grabs the can and he and Patrick wrestle over it. SpongeBob accidentally sprays their clothes and they disappear. 

Patrick: Hey, the invisible spray works! 

(Winnie) Narrator: Narrator laughs as she teaches SpongeBob how to spray a magic circle and how to snap the tail of the can.  They give him an apple off the rock and watch as it explodes in the middle of his invisible circle.  

SpongeBob: snap!  Good job, man!  

Patrick: But what about the water?  

Narrator: SpongeBob turns red and shrugs.  SpongeBob turns into a sea otter.  

Patrick: Why is he blue?  

Narrator: Patrick attacks, throwing him into a deep troll cave.  As the water in the cave begins to rise, a purple swirl forms and a flying purple bird with wings emerges from the water.  a purple bird flies out of the cave to its reveal it is the Furry Lion, singing. (Magical Tune) 

Narrator: SpongeBob and Patrick are now invisible. Patrick shakes the can. 

Patrick: Oh, hey, i think this thing is empty. [SpongeBob grabs the can and shakes it.] 

SpongeBob: Oh, no, it can't be! How are we going to pull off the ultimate prank? Thanks a lot, Patrick. You used the last of it. [SpongeBob throws the can far away.] 

Patrick: Hey, i think i found our pants. [a ripping noise is heard] Oops! Here, these are yours. 

SpongeBob: Oh, forget the pants, Patrick. Let's get home and wash this paint off.  [Patrick pulls out the mask and throws it in the Can.]  

Patrick: Yeah, okay. (Magical Tune) 

Narrator: SpongeBob and Patrick walk off behind Nat. 

SpongeBob: Let's ask this guy. Excuse me, sir, but do you have the time? 

Nat: Sure. [looks at his watch] It's, uh, ten to three. 

SpongeBob: Thank you. 

Nat: Don't mention it. [Nat turns around to notice there is seemingly no one there.] 

Patrick: Don't mention what? 

Nat: Uh, who said that? 

Patrick: Me. 

Nat: [screams] Ghosts! [Nat runs away from them; his eyes pop out. His eyes scream, jump into a car and drive away.] 

Patrick: Hey, i'm no ghost! Well, the nerve of that guy and his driving eyeballs! 

SpongeBob: Yep.  They walk off.  i think we won't stop to talk to him tonight.  He looks crazy.  [shrugs] i don't know.  

SpongeBob: i do!

Narrator: They continue walking.  [turns and sees]  Danny, huffing and puffing. (Magical Tune) 

Narrator: Sandy hears a noise, which is SpongeBob and Patrick's laughter. She checks to see what it is, but there is supposedly nothing there. She gets up and goes to her window.] 

Sandy: Huh? [the outside of her tree is shown] Well, that's funny, i thought i heard voices. Huh? [walks up to a glass of juice on the floor] i thought i left that glass of peanut juice on the table. [walks over to a table with a lamp covered in garbage] And didn't i toss that old lamp out yesterday? And since when did i acquire all these portraits of Patrick? [Photos of Patrick are on the walls and tables, and the rug has his face on it. Sandy turns around and sees SpongeBob and Patrick covered in white sheets over their heads as they wail.] 

SpongeBob and Patrick: We're ghosts. [SpongeBob and Patrick wail again. Sandy laughs.] 

Sandy: i knew it was you guys! Alright, joke's over. Take off the sheets. [pulls off the sheets and notices there is nothing there, then gasps] It is ghosts!

Sandy: Wha?  [camera pans around looking for something] Where is it!  [frowns.] 

SpongeBob: Boy, we really scared her! [SpongeBob and Patrick laugh.] 

Patrick: Who's gonna be our next victim? 

SpongeBob: a better question would be, "Who isn't?" (Magical Tune) 

Narrator: Patrick and possibly SpongeBob eats/eat someone's cake, making it look like ghosts have eaten it. Patrick's face is covered in cake. He belches loudly and wipes it off.] 

Mrs Puff: Oh! [gets filled up with air and then lets it out flying all around] Ghosts! 

Narrator: Her deflated body lands on the table. Patrick is happy because his farting face is gone.  

SpongeBob: No way!  [runs to ghost] 

Patrick: Did you fart?  

Ghost: No.  i got you that way.  

Patrick: No way, no way!  [runs to ghost] 

Patrick: Darn it, i love this place, every one of them!!  

Ghost: Yeah!  

Narrator: In bed, Patrick’s face is covered in leaves. (Magical Tune) 

Narrator:  Squidward is painting and humming to himself at his house. SpongeBob and/or Patrick takes the paintbrush, making it look like it is floating in mid air. 

Squidward: Huh? 

Narrator:  SpongeBob and/or Patrick paint(s) a mustache under Squidward's nose. The two wail ghostly. Squidward crashes through the wall and runs away. 

Squidward: Ghosts

Patrick and SpongeBob: Horribly Horrible (Magical Tune) 

Narrator: Bill is surfing at Goo Lagoon. SpongeBob and Patrick surf up to Bill, making it look like a surfboard is on a wave by itself. 

SpongeBob and Patrick: [Speaking in ghostly voices] Cowabunga! 

Bill: Ghosts! 

narrator: Bill falls off the board. Gale appears waving her arms wildly. 

Gale: Ghosts! 

narrator: Fred appears with his eyes bugging out of his head. 

Fred: Ghosts! 

narrator: Lonnie appears, scared with arms on his head. 

Lonnie: Ghosts! 

narrator: Francis appears in a sort of screaming position. 

Francis: Ghosts! 

narrator: Sandals appears holding a piece of toast. 

Sandals: Toast. 

narrator: Harold appears sitting on the toilet, appearing freaked out. 

Harold: Ghosts! 

narrator: Royce and Joan appear falling all over each other!  

Royce: Ghosts!  

narrator: Ling appears throwing up.  

Ling: Ghosts!  

narrator: Andy appears knocking over random things. 

Andy: Ghosts!  

narrator: Ralph, Kim, and Sally stand on top of the dumpster.  

Kim: No.  No.  No.  Not again!  

narrator: Ralph, Kim, and Sally: Can you hear the old guard yelling?  

Ralph, Kim, and Sally: No.  No.  Not again!  

narrator: Ernie and Terry stand in front of a table covered in tissues.  

Ernie: Toilet!  

narrator: Terry pushes through a car, which is on fire.  

Terry: On fire!  The guy’s on fire!  

Narrator: The man runs away.  With flames and smoke rising behind him. (Magical Tune) 

Narrator: SpongeBob and Patrick are reading newspapers. SpongeBob laughs.

SpongeBob: It's official: we're the greatest pranksters ever. The whole town thinks we're ghosts. 

Narrator:  Patrick is holding his newspaper upside down.

Patrick: Yeah. 

SpongeBob: There's only one guy left to scare, and we'll have pranked everybody in Bikini Bottom-- [An article is shown it reads, "Krabs Last To Be Haunted! says, 'i ain't afraid of no ghosts'"] Mr. Krabs tells us that he's going to start making ghost stories for us. (Magical Tune) 

Narrator: Mr. Krabs peers out of the blinds. 

Mr. Krabs: Ghosts? Ha! i ain't afraid of no ghosts! Every sailor knows a ghost won't come near a fella as long as he's wearing his spotted neckerchief. [grabs a handkerchief] And his dried-up sea leprechaun. [shows ashes of the sea leprechaun] And a bit of gold never hurt. [shows a gold necklace around Mr. Krabs neck that reads, "Foxy"] But to be on the safe side, i'm also wearing me pants in a melvin knot, [his underwear is strung up with rope] got me shivering timber brace, [shows his ankles chained together] and the hairs on the back of me neck are taped down. [a strip of duct tape covers the hair. Mr. Krabs is shown wearing a barrel and a headpiece with lanterns hung on it.] And i'm all wrapped up in a suit of anti-ghost armor. And if none of this stuff works, i've got me secret weapon—the specter deflector! [holds up a paddle ball] So just try and get me, you ghosts! Bring it on. 

narrator: The lights black turn off. SpongeBob and Patrick wail ghostly. 

SpongeBob and Patrick: [As they open the front door] Krabs! 

Mr. Krabs: Wha? 

narrator: SpongeBob and Patrick toss over a table and barrel. They pick up a barrel and a table to make it look like they are floating. 

SpongeBob: Krabs, we've come to haunt you.  

Krab: Where are the pants?  

SpongeBob [points to barrel]: Paddle-ball.  We've come to haunt you!  

Krab: Where are the pants?  

SpongeBob: Paddle-ball.  We've come to haunt you!  

Krab: Wha?  

Mr. Krabs: Paddle-ball!  

SpongeBob [points to table]: Paddle-ball!

Mr. Krabs: i'm warning ya! 

narrator: SpongeBob and Patrick moan. SpongeBob or Patrick stops the ball. SpongeBob or Patrick then cuts the string. 

Mr. Krabs: [shivering] Ooh! 

SpongeBob and Patrick: [quietly] Boo. 

Narrator: Laughs at the living, smiling, impish SpongeBob and Patrick's reaction to his paddle-ball opening line.  

Mr. Nod [driving along the freeway]: [puzzled]: You call that laughing?!  

Mr. Nod: i like ya, SpongeBob.  

Mr. Nod: But you are still a disgusting bum.  [as he drives away]  [cut back to scene and back to adventure]: 

SpongeBob and Patrick [thinking] Ooo! 

Mr. Krabs: i gotta get out of here! 

Narrator: Pause.  

SpongeBob and Patrick: You're kidding! (Magical Tune) 

Narrator: Mr. Krabs runs to the doors, but they don't open. 

SpongeBob: You can't escape, Krabs. We've glued the door shut. 

narrator: The door is held closed with a long strip of glue. 

Mr. Krabs: [off-screen] You'll never get me! 

narrator: Mr. Krabs tries to break through the window, but instead of shattering, the window stretches like elastic and slingshots him backwards, and he crashes into a table. 

Patrick: Nice try, Krabs, but we replaced all the glass with rubber! 

narrator: Mr. Krabs dives into the toilet. 

SpongeBob: Too late, Krabs, we've already clogged all the toilets. 

narrator: The toilet is stuffed with toilet paper. Mr. Krabs cowers in a corner. 

Mr. Krabs: Please, spirits, leave me be.

narrator: Mr. Krabs has crawled to the toilet and vomits.  

SpongeBob:. (Magical Tune) 

Narrator: Mr. Krabs is incoherently begging for his life. 

Patrick: [while Mr. Krabs is incoherently begging for his life] We got him good, SpongeBob. 

SpongeBob: [while Mr. Krabs is incoherently begging for his life] Wait, Patrick, i've got one more idea. [to Mr. Krabs] You're going to pay, Krabs. 

Mr. Krabs: [shaking with fear] No, spirits, please! 

SpongeBob: Pay! 

narrator: a dollar floats in the air. 

Mr. Krabs: No! 

SpongeBob: [high-pitched] Pay! [lights a match] 

Mr. Krabs: No! Don't burn me dollar! 

SpongeBob: [pre-laps note] Oh, baby, it's on!

Narrator: Mr. Krabs grabs a bucket of water and throws it at the dollar. The water drips on SpongeBob and Patrick, making them reappear. They laugh, not noticing they're visible.

Mr. Krabs: Well, well, well, if it isn't SpongeBob and Patrick. 

SpongeBob: [wiggling his arms and legs like a ghost] i know not these names of which you speak. 

narrator: Patrick looks down and notices that he is visible. 

Patrick: Uh, SpongeBob. SpongeBob, we're visible again. 

narrator: Mr. Krabs lifts them up by the back of their necks as they try to run. 

Mr. Krabs: So you two are the Bikini Bottom ghosts. SpongeBob and Patrick, you are invisible.  

narrator: Mr. Krabs slaps Patrick so hard in the face that he flies backward.  

Patrick: Dude!  i am invisible!  

everett: Get him off my property.

SpongeBob: We're really sorry, Mr. Krabs. Please don't chop us into little pieces and eat 'em. 

Narrator: Mr. Krabs puts them down.

Mr. Krabs: Hey, come on, boys, i'm hip! i pulled my share of pranks when i was your age. (Magical Tune) 

Narrator: SpongeBob and Patrick find a crowd of people consisting of: Tom, Bill, Mrs. Puff, Sandy, Squidward, Horace, Harold, Nathiel Waters, the red shirt Frank, Jimmy-Gus, Sadie, Nat, Nazz-Mimi, Purple Scooter, Dennis Rechid, Martin, an anchovy, two Frankie Billys, Clay, and Franco. 

Mr. Krabs: The Krusty Krab presents. live nude pranksters! [He is shown shining the light on them from the crow's nest] Starring the Bikini Bottom Ghosts! 

narrator: Nat, Sadie, Harold, Martin, Abigail Marge, and Frank are shown cheering. SpongeBob and Patrick scream while trying to cover themselves up. Mr. Krabs laughs teasingly. Sandy whistles at them as Mrs. Puff takes a picture. Squidward laughs. SpongeBob and Patrick keep trying to cover themselves. 

SpongeBob: Patrick! 

Patrick: Yeah? 

SpongeBob: [Scene cuts to the outside of the Krusty Krab] We should have bought the whoopee cushion! (The End) 

end montage